Crepes? More like thinly prepared crap!


So I was watching hockey the other night with a few buddies and we order a couple pizzas from a new place, or from our regular place, it doesn't really matter - this post, or at least the first part, has been completely made up to prove a point.

Candidly speaking.

Anyway, the delivery guy shows up but instead of the three pizzas we ordered, he's brought crepes flambe (a delicious and delicate mix of thin pancakes and brandy - set on fire for presentation and flavour purposes).

Now, I'm no savage - I've eaten my fair share of crepes (and quiche), but when you have dudes over for pizza and crepes show up - it got weird.

Plus it takes forever to prep and open flames in the basement isn't a smart move, and I don't plan on standing outside waiting for crepes - the tv would be blocked by the wall (and floor) and while I could PVR the game and wait, there's still the issue of my distaste for smalltalk with delivery people. Not to mention my spoiled, table-fed dogs - who can't hold their Brandy.

The point?

It doesn't mater how rad crepes are - there's a time and a place. Get it?

It's like when the boss joins the usual crowd for drinks after work, or when your one buddy brings his girlfriend/wife/fiancee to 'boys night'.

The simple truth is, in some situations, regardless of how much you may like or respect someone or some delicious crepe, they just don't belong.

For example:

I've done some things that made me a legend in the eyes of some of my college roommates, but I would never reference these stories in a job interview - or while small-talking with Nana.

Alternatively, I've whispered some things into my wife's ear that I wouldn't want my buddies to hear. I'd be a fool to expose my sensitive side to a pack of heartless (albiet hilarious) ass-hats.

Chances are you get the point by now - these are some pretty common social 'faux pas'.

And yet, more often than not, I come across brands that forget what's acceptably 'social' when it comes to their brand's social media.

Now the extreme examples of these social media 'crepes' can be found on websites like www.lamebook.com and www.failbook.com, but I see the same stuff in a much less obvious but equally damaging way on business page sites daily.

They may not be the types of faux pas that are worthy of posting on a comedy site or reporting to the digital media manager - but they are bad enough, just awkward enough to make your community uncomfortable with you.

It's not you personally, just socially. It's weird. You are making it awkward.

The worst part is that businesses pay, with their payroll or their time, to post stuff on social media that are turning people off. They are paying to lose people's interest.

The good news is there's one simple step you can take to stop all the unnecessary crepe deliveries.

It's just one question and I ask it to every brand manager, business owner and decision maker I work with - why?

Why are you on Facebook?

Why are you on Instagram?

Why Pinterest?

Why a newsletter?

Why are you asking for permission to email them?

You should know exactly why - but most people don't.

So, I tap right into my inner three-year-old, asking 'why?' until I get an answer that makes sense or an admission that they 'do' social media the way bored kids 'do' church.

The fact of the matter is that church, and crepes, are both quite popular - but not with everyone and not all the time.

If you are in charge of marketing a brand, you need someone to strategize the 'why' for everything you do - it's the only way you will ever reach a goal. And if you don't have goals for your social media, you may as well spend your time pressing already-lit elevator buttons.

You're a monkey, Derek! - Zoolander

Alternatively, you could give me a call. I help brands understand how to use social media to actually achieve something.


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